I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
Randomize
