yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
Randomize
