just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
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