I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
