ya dads aren't the best wingmen
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
found the other keg... it's in the tree
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Did you pee in the oven last night??
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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