My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
