Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
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