I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Randomize
