It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
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