Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
Randomize
