meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
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