I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
You don't make any sense
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