My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
