Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
