Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
soo... how was my night?
Randomize
