So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
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