I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
Randomize
