you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
