who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
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