Whatcha textin bout Willis?
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
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