so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
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