AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
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