in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Randomize
