The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
two words: eviction party
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
My vagina is officially offended.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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