She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
