i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize