I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
Everclear isn't food dammit
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
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