it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
Randomize
