You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Randomize
