Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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