So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Randomize
