I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
Randomize
