Christians are straight up FREAKS
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
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