I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
