O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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