just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Randomize
