I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
