so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
