Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
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