U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
Randomize
