He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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