why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
The maid of honor just puked.
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
