Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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