Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
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