Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Randomize
