So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
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