I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Your topless pictures make me question reality
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Randomize
