He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Randomize
