I don't usually arrange sex via text message
if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
