The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Randomize
